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Want to find out what movies are heading to Netflix Streaming? I got your back.
Upcoming Netflix Streaming Titles
5/29 - Hot Girls Wanted*
6/1 - The Aviator, Employee Of The Month, Hidden Kingdoms, The High and the Mighty, The Magdalene Sisters, The Perfect Dictatorship (La Dictadura Pefecta), Sex Ed
6/3 - The Best of Me*, Hector and the Search For Happiness*
6/5 - Sense8 (Netflix Original Series)
6/6 - On The Road
6/7 - Words and Pictures
6/8 - Grace of Monaco
6/9 - Free The Nipple*, It's Hard Being Loved by Jerks*
6/10 - Nightcrawler, Rosewater
6/11 - The Legend, The Legend 2
6/12 - Champs*, The Cobbler*, Orange is the New Black (Season 3), Life of Crime
6/13 - Antarctica: A Year On Ice*, Transformers: Age of Extinction
6/15 - Pussy Riot: A Punk Prayer
6/16 - Backstreet Boys: Show 'Em What You're Made Of, The Butler, Curious George; Two Days, One Night
6/17 - Point and Shoot*
6/19 - A Most Wanted Man
6/20 - Cake*
6/23 - Advantageous*
6/24 - Beyond The Lights*
6/25 - Ballet 422*
6/26 - What Happened, Nina Simone?
6/27 - The Reluctant Fundamentalist*
7/10 - Chris Tucker Live
7/31 - Wet Hot American Summer: First Day At Camp (Netflix Original Series)
What to Watch This Week
It's the end of the month so you better look through your queue and see what may be expiring come Monday. Though the monthly changeover will steal your attention away and bring in a lot more titles not listed above, the only notable and possibly worthwhile release this week is Hot Girls Wanted. However, you will need a strong stomach because the Rashida Jones-produced documentary takes a close up look at the amateur porn scene in Miami and how a bunch of young girls willingly chose to partake in it.
New Streaming Titles I Previously Forgot to Mention
Taylor Kitsch continues his career downfall with the parkour action film Tracers; the return of Ava DuVernay's breakthrough feature Middle of Nowhere; and the failed teen flick Bandslam.
I'll see you again next Friday.
Cameron Crowe had been a beloved auteur of mine in the past, even when I lived through the pop-cultural overdosing of his most famous feature JERRY MAGUIRE. He was able to wrestle out and craft these funny yet moving tales led by what he dubbed the "battered idealist". I skipped out on him after the dismal response to VANILLA SKY and stood on the sidelines when his two successive features ended up being prime material for the internet community to bounce on. I return to the world of Crowe with ALOHA, only to find it to be an inhabitable island of dreck, littered with inexcusable dialogue and plagued by absurd storytelling. This movie is one of the most embarrassing big-time rom-coms to come out of Hollywood in quite some time. It also continues the trend set by THE DESCENDANTS in that films set in Hawaii are doomed to fail if the entire cast is nearly comprised entirely of Caucasian characters. While that unjustly favored drama went on to be an awards favorite, everyone from average Joe to the Academy can see that ALOHA is a complete and total mess.
Bradley Cooper stars as Brian Gilcrest. I would further explain what he does for a living but the film doesn't easily address it. During the course of many ludicrous events, he works as a military contractor, a rocket scientist, a negotiator, a hacker, a software engineer, and beyond. He's back in Hawaii working under the watch of billionaire Carson Welch (Bill Murray), who left him for dead in Kabul for a specific reason. Brian got better but now sports a surgical repaired right leg; I'll bring this note back up later and not just to mock Cooper for often forgetting to walk with a limp. Welch is working with the U.S. military to send up a private satellite into space and Brian is the man to help do it just because. He's assigned a partner/watch dog in the form of hot-shot fighter pilot Allison Ng (Emma Stone). Yes, Stone was cast to play a 1/4 Hawaiian, 1/4 Chinese and 1/2 Swedish character who lives and operates in Hawaii yet has a skin color of pure white. Things get further complicated when his ex-flame Tracy (Rachel McAdams) gets to be a little too friendly, much to the quiet chagrin of her ever so stoic husband (John Krasinski).
This all seems so easy to digest for the viewer, mild white-washing aside, but it is in the gross execution and creativity of Crowe that ultimately will drive you insane. The dialogue is practically incomprehensible, riddled with hipster wordplay and continuously flowing out of the actors' mouths like diarrhea. The editing structure has no sense of blend or tone, as it just cuts and cuts away any form of continuity and even parts of the story. The soundtrack is the usual bag of old standard rock songs that Crowe likes but it is ruined by the film's extensive amounts of ADR. The cinematography has a nice sun-bleached look to it, similar to the Hawaiian home movies of old as seen in the long opening credits, but Crowe wheels back any further creative ideas from the film's DP Eric Gautier. Most of the film is shot in standard medium and closeup framing; after all, it's Crowe's story that people came to see, not the hard work of others.
The very minor charm of the actors, Stone and Murray especially, can not hide any of the sheer amount of lunacy in Crowe's screenplay. Some of his story's true lowlights include: Brian being labeled as a cynic misanthrope despite acting like a charming, smooth operator from frame two; Danny McBride's character being nicknamed "Fingers" because he constantly rolls his fingers like he's Satchmo on the air trumpet; Brian has two big toes stitched together on his damaged leg and shows it to us out of nowhere; Tracy acts way too inconsiderate and has Brian hang around with her children like it's nothing; a kid breaks through a restricted area and videotapes top secret information off-screen for purely convenient reasons; a breakup scene takes place while a character is wearing an ugly hat that literally covers their face, similar to a bucket; and the non-climactic coup de grâce where a problem is stupidly solved by unleashing a bomb of random video clips and significant sound bites. I could go on further about other oddities and my personal favorites, including a dance scene that needs to be seen to believe, but you get the point. However, the most wretched design by Crowe is the Allison Ng character. Another one of his pathetic Manic Pixie Dream Girls, Allison is a not real adult but a petulant child. She huffs and puffs when she doesn't get her way, performs her morning run by jumping up and down and clapping her hands, and she somehow is unable to get a guy, especially as a fighter pilot. Even more worse, she is the film's resident Hawaiian folklore expert ("I'm Hawaiian!" she keeps saying), consistently acting like a crazy person that every small thing, including a wind breeze blowing open a window, is the work of the spirits. She believes that her and Brian's military mission is messing up with the "mana" of the island and she wants to preserve the sky. Oh, that great sky and and all of its stars; let Cameron Crowe go on and on about its so-called majestic power.
This mumbo-jumbo and pseudo spiritual side of the picture ties in with Crowe's horrific treatment of the Native Hawaiians. According to his vision, these non-white people live in the far off wilderness to themselves, protesting the U.S. occupation of Hawaii. They are all characterize as racist thugs, giving the stink eye to Brian and Allison and ready to beat them up for daring to step on their land and trying to broker a deal with their nationalist leader. Of course, when cooler heads prevail, they are then seen as beer-chugging citizens who like to sing folk songs. All of this is pretty heinous, especially since, again, there is a lack of non-Caucasian characters outside of this area. I would properly be more offended by it if the whole negotiating conflict didn't make me recall a hilarious running gag on the television show Parks and Recreations, where its resident Native Americans would jokingly play on their culture and stereotypes to scare white people.
From his poor handling in the technical department to the muck that is his screenplay, Crowe allowed ALOHA to be his absolute worst film and his potential career killer. His terrible artistry displayed here is unacceptable for current and future mass consumption. It begs the question of how did he not see everything that is wrong with the picture, most definitely when the film reaches its unintentionally creepy conclusion. I would say that he should charge up his batteries and get a new, updated set list but quite frankly, he has now sadly become the joke everyone labels him to be.
FINAL REVIEW: 1 / 5
Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg sadly return again with another one of their beyond awful spoof movies, this time mocking THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS. Notice that I said the first movie, not the whole franchise itself; yes, it does throw in some digs at FAST FIVE but for the most part it solely targets a film that came out 14 years ago. Though this type of "comedy" is once again totally laughter-free and looks like chump change despite a production budget of $20 million, there's something shocking to declare: the pathetic duo actually put some care into their product! Several early scenes actually have decent lightning schemes, presenting a wave of dark moods and colors to the illegal street-racing. The two even nearly craft an entire spoof movie without any additional visual non-sequiturs, only to spring up a Grand Theft Auto V jest right out of nowhere. Alas, these promising developments are short-lived and Seltzer and Friedberg return to their putrid ways. Honestly, they really should have throw in some intolerable random references because they offer up no real jokes to speak off. The two often just have their third-rate performers break the fourth wall badly, such as how the crew needs "a random rapper cameo" in order to get the urban demographic or how the music is very ominous in one scene. Other wisecracks are poorly thought-out, like the running gag of The Cool Asian always eating something, or simply dreadful, like the unbearable anti-comedy of a guy unable to get a seatbelt to work. Also, it's pretty hard to accept jabs at Paul Walker and his character in this day and age; the actor playing Not Brian O'Conner is another story. I would say to avoid this but since Seltzer and Friedberg are now roughing it out in the indies, it's easier to do than say.
FINAL REVIEW: 1 / 5
After once again rescuing the Cosmic Cube and Loki's scepter from the hands of evil, Tony Stark and Bruce Banner notice an advanced A.I. program hidden within the Cube. Dubbed Ultron by his creators, the advanced being immediately goes rogue and sets out to destroy the planet. The Avengers need to come together as one, take care of a brother-sister duo embedded with engineered superpowers, and ultimately stop Ultron from succeeding in his plan for global annihilation. AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON is very entertaining albeit shaky conclusion to Phase Two of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Its action-packed prologue is frankly not as exciting as it wished to be, largely due to its darker color palette and familiar theatrics. It then steadily rises in absolute thrills and quality with its thankfully quick introduction of Ultron and the much-hyped Hulk vs. Iron Man fight, which wisely blends the destructive fun of the brawl with the realistic horrors that the melee would cause on innocent bystanders. After taking a detour at a surprise location, the film crescendos with an earthshaking finale that brilliantly showcases the hero in superheroics. The returning cast members continue to deliver good performances, although Chris Hemsworth really got the short end of the stick this time around. Newcomers Elizabeth Olsen and Aaron Taylor-Johnson work up some wonders as the creepy tweeners Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver respectively. However, all pale in comparison to James Spader, who is brilliantly able to make Ultron look menacing one minute and humorously petulant the next. Though I was pleased with Joss Whedon's creative direction and continuing drive to bring character and charm to his players, he does once again utilize the trope of a major death taking place purely for motivational reasons. Just as a reminder, this stale trope has been used in every film of this Phase save for GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY. Whedon's picture also is dumbed down by its blatant sequel bait for four upcoming Marvel films, causing the viewer to feel more like a sucker than ever before. Despite these misgivings, the film does offer up enough to be a bountiful fest. And as for the mid-stinger (there is no extra one at the end), it's as lame as it gets.
FINAL REVIEW: 4 / 5
A rebellious yet glass-half-full teenager (Britt Robertson) is secretly given a pin that grants her a vision to a futuristic utopia. She sets out to locate the city, eventually coming into contact with a kiddie android named Athena (Raffey Cassidy) and a boy genius turned adult hermit (George Clooney). That may sound like a breezy adventure film worthy for families but I forgot to mention its casual swiping of THE TERMINATOR, CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND, THE ROCKETEER and other better films in order to cover up its own massive shortcomings. TOMORROWLAND is nonessential tripe, spending all of its time and budget on a story that is putrid at best and a message that can easily be gleamed from an average GE commercial. It also does justice to the idiom that those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones; director Brad Bird and his co-screenwriter Damon Lindelof criticize video games,the TRANSFORMERS films and the like for spreading doom and gloom as entertainment despite the fact that their own film features innocents being zapped and explosive mayhem more than the wonderment of scientific/artistic advancement. Heck, even when the characters get to the titled location, the city is in shambles and practically abandoned, now ruled over by a dictator for no real reason given. When it isn't "homaging", the script is riddled with sheer incompetence, crafting scenarios that significantly pad out the film, never explaining why the main heroine is so necessary beyond "she's special", and making all of these so-called intellectual saviors look like total dullards. As an example of the latter, there's a scene where a clear-as-day rocket ship rises up from a famous landmark. As it comes close to her position, Robertson goofily exclaims, "It's a rocket!" There's also a subplot where Clooney rues over his former feelings of Athena that just nearly heads into squeamish territory. Though the film has a few redeeming elements, such as a simulated one-take around the city and a home invasion sequence, TOMORROWLAND is yet another live-action failure for Disney and sadly besmirches the good character of Brad Bird.
FINAL REVIEW: 2 / 5
This year's Cannes Film Festival ended with a shocking win but for the most part was largely uneventful. The only major news story from the event didn't come from any of the films but from the controversy of several female viewers being delayed at screenings because they weren't wearing high heels, apparently breaking a so-called unwritten rule of the festival. As for the films, save for a couple of acclaimed features, a colossal failure, and a 3D porno, the selection was mixed at best. The Coen Brothers were the Presidents of the Main Competition jury and had an eclectic body to preside over: actor Jake Gyllenhaal; actresses Sophie Marceau, Sienna Miller, and Rossy de Palma; directors Guillermo de Toro and Xavier Dolan; and strange outsider/singer-songwriter Rokia Traoré. After viewing the 19 films, they proceeded to give out the awards in a most puzzling fashion.
The Palme d'Or was given to Dheepan, much to the chagrin of film critics everywhere. The French movie was directed and co-written by Jacques Audiard, best known for A Prophet and his last Cannes entry Rust and Bone. The film follows three Tamil strangers, one of whom was formerly a child soldier, as they escape Sri Lanka and pose as a family in France. Though lightly praised, it was mocked for its strange concluding moments, where the somber drama suddenly turns into an action affair.
The Grand Prix, a.k.a. the 2nd place ribbon, was given to Son of Saul, a movie that I expectedly rolled my eyes upon first hearing (it's another Holocaust drama) but was met with a ton of acclaim post-premiere. The debut feature of László Nemes, the Hungary film in set in Auschwitz, where a Sonderkommando tries to perform the Jewish last rites on a body he believes to be his son, all the while his fellow forced laborers plan an uprising. Though other films have told the story of the Sonderkommandos before (The Grey Zone comes to mind), this film was lauded for its horrific quality and its expert cinematography and soundtrack. Expected to be the odds-on favorite to win the Palme, it instead wound up missing the chance to rip the tape.
The Jury Prize, a.k.a. the bronze medal, went to The Lobster, the latest from international cult favorite Yorgos Lanthimos (Dogtooth). His English-language debut, the surreal sci-fi rom-com has Colin Farrell must search all over a hotel for mate within a 45-day time limit or else risk being turned into an animal. With that plot description, I am already right on board to check this one out. The film also picked up the Grand Jury Prize for the Palm Dog Award and a special mention for the Queer Palm.
Best Director went to Hou Hsiao-Hsien for The Assassin, a wuxia flick that had film lovers salivating due to its cinematography. Some critics even went as far as calling it the most beautiful film ever made. It too was highly favored to win, most likely ending up with the Grand Prix, but it just missed the podium.
Best Screenplay of course always goes to a downer, with this year being handed off to Chronic. Tim Roth stars as a possibly deranged nurse working in the ward for the terminally ill. Roth was pointed out as the only highlight of the dour drama.
César-bridesmaid Vincent Lindon finally got to earn a major win for once, taking the Best Actor award for his performance in The Measure of a Man. Here, he plays an unemployed man desperately looking to provide for his family, only to gain the position as a security guard of a department store and slowly start to unravel.
Best Actress yet again was split between two performers but not from the same movie this time around. First up was Rooney Mara for her work Carol, the latest from Todd Haynes. The most acclaimed film of the entire festival, the romantic drama had Mara playing a department store clerk in the 1950's, as she enters into an affair with Cate Blanchett. Observers predicted the film to be next Blue is the Warmest Color, winning the Palme and either a special award or this category for Mara and Blanchett. The jury had other plans, however, and only Mara was praised. Her co-owner of the title was Emmanuelle Bercot, who plays a woman caught up with the highs and lows of love in Maïwenn's Mon roi. Reading from some notices, it looks like both the film and her acting are completely overwrought, telling nothing new or worthy enough to win in a category. The award was a 2nd honor for Bercot this year, as her latest directed film Standing Tall was selected to be the opening film of the festival.
Before we go over the other unloved films in the Main Competition, let's talk about the elephant in the room: Gus Van Sant's The Sea of Trees. The movie had a famous director, a pedigreed cast (Matthew McConaughey, Ken Watanabe, Naomi Watts), and was set in the "Suicide Forest", a real-life area in Japan where many people venture to in order to kill themselves. And it was booed out of the building. It was so badly received, it was earning below one-star ratings in the polls. Many jeered at its screenplay, for its long monologues and twist ending; in the case of the latter, critics alluded to it as being somewhere between M. Night Shyamalan and Nicolas Sparks. What did you expect from Chris Sparling, the guy whose last produced script was ATM?
Now, as for the others: Matteo Garrone (Gomorrah) furthered his experimental side with Tale of Tales, a fantasy-horror film consisting of three pre-Grimm fairy tales; Denis Villeneuve’s Sicario, about a FBI agent trying to take down Mexican drug cartels, unnerved some critics but Emily Blunt's passive lead performance and Roger Deakins' cinematography earned raves; Michael Fassbender got to do Shakespeare with the latest filmed adaptation of Macbeth; Hirokazu Koreeda returned with Our Little Sister, an adaptation of a shoujo manga about a trio of female siblings taking in their unknown half-sister; Italian film My Mother had a hard time picking a tone, as it jumps between a satire about moviemaking and a sober drama about a dying parent; Joachim Trier (Oslo, August 31st) returned with Louder Than Bombs, his English-language debut about a family trying to come to terms with the suicide of their mother/wife; Jia Zhangke's Mountains May Depart continued his sharp attacks on China's masking of capitalism through communism; Paolo Sorrentino tripped up with Youth, where Michael Caine and Harvey Keitel hang out at a spa; Valley of Love has Isabelle Huppert and Gérard Depardieu wandering around Death Valley for dumb reasons; and one of Truffaut's forlorn projects was brought to life in Marguerite & Julien, an incest drama that was thankfully derided by viewers.
Additional highlights and those in Un Certain Regard: Rams, a dramedy about two estranged brothers coming together to save their flock, won the Un Certain Regard Award; French provocateur Gaspar Noé premiered his 3D autobiographical porno Love but the unsimulated sex scenes couldn't overtake its terrible script and acting; People got to have their first taste Inside Out and Irrational Man, with many praising the former more over the latter; Jeremy Saulnier followed up Blue Ruin with the premiere of Green Room, where a punk rock band tries to fight their way out of a bar filled with skinheads, who are led by none other than Patrick Stewart (!); Takashi Miike unleashed Yakuza Apocalypse, a gonzo yakuza flick filled with vampires, kappas, and a mascot-wearing badass; Kiyoshi Kurosawa won Best Director for Un Certain Regard yet had everybody snoring with his low-key ghost drama Journey to the Shore; and Apichatpong Weerasethakul was regulated to the minor leagues for no real reason yet earned his usual praise for Cemetery of Splendor.
Want to find out what movies are heading to Netflix Streaming? I got your back.
Upcoming Netflix Streaming Titles
5/22 - Inglourious Basterds, The Other One: The Long Strange Trip of Bob Weir
5/23 - The Boxtrolls, The Prince
5/24 - Love and Honor, Welcome to the Punch
5/27 - Before I Go To Sleep
5/29 - Hot Girls Wanted*
6/1 - The Aviator, Employee Of The Month, Hidden Kingdoms, The High and the Mighty, The Magdalene Sisters, The Perfect Dictatorship (La Dictadura Pefecta), Sex Ed
6/3 - The Best of Me*, Hector and the Search For Happiness*
6/5 - Sense8 (Netflix Original Series)
6/6 - On The Road
6/7 - Words and Pictures
6/8 - Grace of Monaco
6/9 - Free The Nipple*, It's Hard Being Loved by Jerks*
6/10 - Nightcrawler, Rosewater
6/11 - The Legend, The Legend 2
6/12 - Champs*, The Cobbler*, Orange is the New Black (Season 3), Life of Crime
6/13 - Antarctica: A Year On Ice*, Transformers: Age of Extinction
6/15 - Pussy Riot: A Punk Prayer
6/16 - Backstreet Boys: Show 'Em What You're Made Of, The Butler, Curious George; Two Days, One Night
6/17 - Point and Shoot*
6/19 - A Most Wanted Man
6/20 - Cake*
6/23 - Advantageous*
6/24 - Beyond The Lights*
6/25 - Ballet 422*
6/26 - What Happened, Nina Simone?
6/27 - The Reluctant Fundamentalist*
7/10 - Chris Tucker Live
7/31 - Wet Hot American Summer: First Day At Camp (Netflix Original Series)
What to Watch This Week
Inglourious Basterds is always a worthy watch. Animation fans and those with kids can partake in last year's stop-motion sleeper The Boxtrolls. And finally, if you want to see an good action flick, Welcome to the Punch brought some much needed guns and grits to the field.
New Streaming Titles I Previously Forgot to Mention
Forgotten but still acclaimed Oscar-nominated drama In The Bedroom and the unwanted second season of Netflix's Richie Rich.
I'll see you again next Friday.
I would usually have my shouting picture of Underdogs headlining but since that movie is still on schedule to be buried away in August, I had to find something more appropriate. The image above comes from Area 51, another one of those movies that slipped out of critical grasp and placed on this list. Written and directed by Oren Peli (Paranormal Activity), it's another found footage horror film where a bunch of idiots illegally venture into the infamous military complex to find aliens; apparently these dullards didn't follow the news or get a chance to see Zero Dark Thirty. The film started production way back in 2009, had several reshoots in 2011 and 2013 and is now finally coming out today, albeit in a few theaters. While it finally got its chance to be released, the films below, both new and old, still have the short end of the stick.
Now, let's look over the movies that are stuck in distribution purgatory.
7500
Plot: A flight to Tokyo hits some unknown, supernatural turbulence. Stars Ryan Kwanten, Jaime Chung, Leslie Bibb, and Amy Smart. Directed by Takashi Shimizu (The Ju-On/The Grudge franchise).
Previously Covered in Last Article(s)
Updated Status: Still Unknown. Again, it will most likely be buried away on to home video at some point.
Cooties
Plot: A mysterious virus turns elementary schoolers into vicious creatures and only their teachers can stop the menace. Stars Elijah Wood, Alison Pill, Riann Wilson, and Jack McBrayer.
Previously Covered in Last Article
Current Status: Set for release on September 18, 2015. Lionsgate finally decided to do something with it. A new poster is up but still no trailer has been produced.
Demonic
Plot: Law enforcement try to figure out whether or not an attempted summoning of ghosts caused the death of five people. Stars Maria Bello and Frank Grillo.
Previously Covered in Last Article
Current Status: Still Postponed Indefinitely. Though Dimension Films has no plans for it to come out in the USA just yet, they are moving forward with a wide release in Europe, as evident by an UK trailer released in late April.
Dino Time
Plot: Three kids mess around with a scientist's time machine and find themselves messing around with dinosaurs. Voices include Pamela Adlon, Tara Strong, Yuri Lowenthal, and Jane Lynch. Produced by the Southern Korean powerhouse CJ Entertainment and specifically designed to meet the 3D quota for theater owners.
Previously Covered in Last Article(s)
Updated Status: Trying to capitalize on the expected popularity of Jurassic World, this lost animated flick will finally be released but under even more dubious circumstances: it has been re-named Back to the Jurassic and will be released on DVD and Blu-ray on June 9, 2015.
Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films
Plot: A documentary on the craziness that was The Cannon Group, chiefly the years when Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus were running the show. Directed by Mark Hartley, who has previously covered Australia's exploitation film industry (Not Quite Hollywood) and the American B-movies shot in the Philippines (Machete Maidens Unleashed!).
Previously Covered in Last Article
Current Status: Still Unknown. The UK get to experience it first hand in theaters on June 5th but us Americans still have no chance to see it save for some film festivals. Plus, it's already on home video in France and Germany!
Empires of the Deep
Plot: Positioned as China's Avatar, this fantasy tale tells the love between a man and a mermaid and the war between aquatic nations. Stars Olga Kurylenko.
Previously Covered in Last Article
Current Status: Still Unknown. No new updates have been made available.
Grace of Monaco
Plot: A day in the stressful life of Princess Grace Kelly, as she tries to figure out whether to return to Hollywood or support her husband during a major political battle. Stars Nicole Kidman and Tim Roth. Directed by Olivier Dahan (La Vie en Rose).
Previously Covered in Last Article
Current Status: Missing on topping many Worst of Film 2015 lists this year, the derided biopic will instead be eligible for Worst of TV 2015 lists, as it is set to premiere on Lifetime Network on May 25th. No word on which of the two cuts will be the one airing.
Hillsong - Let Hope Rise
Plot: A documentary/concert film about the Australian megachurch Hillsong and their music label Hillsong United.
Pre-Release Buzz: Originally set to come out on March 27 or April 1 of this year.
Current Status: Now set to come out on September 30.
The Green Inferno
Plot: Clearly borrowing from the despicable template of the cannibal horror craze, a group of environmental activists are captured and ready to be served as dinner to the tribe they wished to protect. Eli Roth's latest film.
Previously Covered in Last Article(s)
Updated Status: Still Postponed Indefinitely.
A Little Chaos
Plot: A non-conforming female garden designer (Kate Winslet) is hired on to work for King Louis XIV. Directed and starring Alan Rickman.
Pre-Release Buzz: Originally set to come out on March 27 of this year.
Current Status: Now set to come out on June 26.
Me Before You
Plot: An adaptation of a popular book by Jojo Moyes, Emilia Clarke stars as an ordinary woman who is hired to take care of a paralyzed sourpuss played by Sam Claflin.
Pre-Release Buzz: Originally set to come out August 21 of this year, it was suddenly removed from schedule and pushed to an unknown date next year.
Current Status: Now set to be widely released on June 3, 2016.
The Moon and the Sun
Plot: The second film on this list to be centered around King Louis XIV, this kids flick has the Sun King looking to snatch a mermaid in order to seek immortality. Yes, that is the real plot of the picture. Pierce Brosnan and Fan Bingbing are the unfortunate ones playing Louis and the mermaid respectively.
Pre-Release Buzz: Originally set to come out on April 10 of this year.
Current Status: Postponed Indefinitely. Paramount cancelled the release three weeks before its premiere and have not given it a new date.
Ratchet & Clank
Plot: An updated remake of the first video game of the popular series, the animated film will show how a "lombax" and a small robot became friends and stopped Chairman Drex from creating his own perfect planet by destroying an entire galaxy. James Arnold Taylor and David Kaye will continue on as the voices of the titled characters. Celebrity voices include Paul Giamatti, John Goodman, Bella Thorne, Rosario Dawson, and Sylvester Stallone. Focus Features is distributing.
Pre-Release Buzz: A teaser trailer was released way back in April 2013. A brief trailer later premiered at E3 2014. It was expected to come out in 2015.
Current Status: Set to be widely released on April 29, 2016.
Rock The Kasbah
Plot: A desperate pop music manager finds the right voice in a lowly Afghan girl and tries to get her on Afghanistan's version of Idol. Directed by Barry Levinson and written by Mitch Glazer. Starring Bruce Willis, Bill Murray, Zooey Deschanel, and Kate Hudson.
Pre-Release Buzz: Original set to come out on April 24 of this year.
Current Status: Was set to be widely released on November 13, 2015, the film has been bumped up to October 23.
Sly Cooper
Plot: Similar to Ratchet & Clank, this also will be a feature film adaptation of the first video game of the series, Sly Cooper and the Thievius Raccoonus. A raccoon from a long line of master thieves tries to recover his family's bible of sneaky tricks, with the help of his friends: a gadget-making turtle and a pro-wrestling hippo. The band of thieves' original voice actors will be reprising.
Pre-Release Buzz: A teaser trailer/short movie was released in January 2014. Many fans, including myself, were disappointed and a bit disgusted with the revamped character designs of the lovable trio. Swapping out the cel-shading style of the games is understandable but the new look is pretty glaring.
Current Status: In Production. Expected to come out some time in 2016.
The Wonders
Plot: Four sisters help out their dad in the honey-making business and later try to enter a television contest. Directed by Alice Rohrwacher.
Previously Covered in Last Article
Current Status: Oscilloscope Laboratories picked it up on May 4 and plan to release it later this year.
Of course there are probably more films I still forgot to cover here, so they will have to wait until the next iteration of this series.
